The Bourough’s female Christian activist group “The Christian Motherhood “ is planing to stage a protest at the winter solstice fire sculptures burning on the 22nd of June, calling the event an immoral satanic pagan ritual that will corrupt our good Christian citizens. The groups spokeswoman Ingrid Tightbottom said “ Our members are aghast! These so called sculptures are just thinly veiled phallic symbols, one looks like a giant penis and the other represents the chocolate starfish it’s as plain to see as the nose on your face”
Outspoken local resident Terry Talkbackradio said “ If the council want to see the local residents gathering around happy and cheering about something burning I suggest they set fire to their bloody council office!” It’s a bloody disgrace that my rates are paying for these lefty pinko tree hunging dole bludgers to stand around drinking mulled wine while burning big wooden cocks just so they can post pictures of themselves wearing op shop coats an knitted beanies on instabook or whatever that bloody crap is called, honestly who cares. In my opinion if you want to have useful bloody fires then reintroduce backyard incinerators.”
Lowlight Satanic Ritual Protest
