1740’s season has been dealt a cruel blow, with Perfect Pete ruled out with a double break to the elbow. It can now be revealed that the break was caused by a lack of calcium in his bones, due to his fetish for Almond Milk Lattes.
In a further twist, it has been alleged that he was aware of the calcium deficiency, which was a known issue and that his move to Calcium Park was part of a confused response when told he needed more minerals.
1740 Management we’re unavailable for comment when contacted, however some players are alleged to have joked about finding the chink in the armour of the great man.
